Pleasanteeism is a word coined from Pleasant and presenteism which reflects growing “hush workplace trends” where workers conceal their actions and true emotions to fit in with workplace expectations, according to Bryan Robinson, Ph.D., the author of Chained to the Desk in a Hybrid World.
In his article published in Forbe, Fr. Robinson highlighted the danger of plesanteeism and how navigate the trap and prevent them from stalling your career.
According to him, “79% of employees say they must perform to “show” their employers they’re working.” This necessitated the coining of “pleasanteeism” , a phenomenon where employees feel pressured to appear cheerful and positive, even when they feel stressed, overwhelmed or unhappy.”
The “hush trends” in workplaces, according to him, “make it hard for workers to know what is safe to say out loud at work and what they need to keep silent.”
Robinson shared insight of Guy Thornton, founder of Practice Aptitude Tests, “According to him, “The art of concealing emotion is nothing new, especially in the workplace. When you are at work, you are taught to be professional, and often, subconsciously, we don’t pair expressing emotions with professionalism, which is where ‘pleasanteeism’ is born.”
He listed five instances when pleasanteeism is bad for career to include:
- If you’re a “yes-person,” afraid of disapproval and judgment, you betray your own truth and agree with colleagues even when you actually don’t agree and say yes when you really mean no.
- If you’re a conflict avoider, afraid you can’t stand your ground in a disagreement, and go along with the team to avoid conflict.
- If you’re Mr. or Ms. Nice Guy and use manipulation to sell your soul in hopes of reaching the top of the career ladder.
- If you’re an insecure people-pleaser who agrees with the majority out of fear of not fitting in.
- If you’re the peace-maker, threatened by disagreements, and go along with the group to create harmony and keep the peace.
How Employees Can Avoid ‘Pleasanteeism’
- Accepting and being aware of your emotions: According to Gordon, “Look for opportunities to communicate honestly with your team, manager or HR,” he advises. “Share your workload challenges or any stress you’re facing, either in one-on-one check-ins or during team meetings. This can help normalize expressing emotions beyond just positivity.”
- Getting comfortable with disapproval and disagreements: Start to see your individualism as a healthy approach. Reclaim your self-respect, stand firm in your values and opinions and be willing to speak up or say no. Be your own person, map your own career goals and gauge your actions by your own standards, not by the approval of others.
- Practicing direct communication: Clear communication is the foundation of a healthy and productive work culture—especially in today’s workplace where many employees have hybrid jobs, work remotely or teams are dispersed. When someone pretends to feel one way and they actually feel the opposite, it breaks down communication and ultimately leads to workplace confusion.
- Being fearless and stop masking your feelings: Constantly suppressing your feelings can negatively impact your mental health. “Pleasanteeism” goes against the grain of self-advocacy and creating a culture of trust and transparency. When you don’t advocate for yourself, your career is doomed. “Remember, you don’t have to force a smile or enthusiasm when you’re not feeling it,” Gordon advises.
- “Instead, aim for a calm and polite demeanor that reflects a balanced approach. This way, you can remain approachable without putting on a façade.”
- Considering the cost of inaction: I spoke with Dr. Rebecca Heiss, founder of icueity and author of INSTINCT. “We’re quite good at predicting and measuring the costs of our actions,” she told me. “‘I might look foolish. I might fail. I might be rejected.’ Too often what we neglect to measure are the costs of our inactions—how us not showing up or asking the question ultimately costs us more than any cost of action. Go big and play all-in. Regrets are far more painful and offer no lessons to grow.”
- Encouraging discussions about mental health and well-being with your colleagues. “Normalizing conversations around stress and work-life balance can help create a culture where everyone feels comfortable being honest about their experiences,” Gordon concludes.
- Create an Open Environment: Gordon asserted that managers need to foster an environment that encourages people to be open. “It can be as simple as asking the team about their weekend, any evening plans and how they are doing overall.”
- Speak Up: When being pleasant is based on cooperation and team spirit it’s one thing, but there’s a point at which “pleasanteeism”—when it’s fear-based—has a negative impact on how you’re viewed in the workplace. It’s one thing to submit to rules and policies, yet quite another to fold yourself into a disingenuous pretzel to gain approval from corporate honchos, managers or coworkers.
When you’re afraid to speak up, disagree, say no, think outside the box or stick your neck out in a creative way, you could be unwittingly sabotaging your career.
“Pleasanteeism” leads to pressure to keep up the facade, but it has a short shelf life before higher-ups and colleagues see through it. It’s important to know the line of when to speak out against or when to conform to the group. Research shows when employees sell out, avoid conflict or try to be Ms. or Mr. Nice Guy in hopes of reaching the top of the career ladder, those strategies don’t work.
In concluison, Robission adbised ” If you’ve practiced “pleasanteeism” and are ready to take the risk to bloom in your career, it might be time to go against the fear of ridicule, rejection or being labeled a troublemaker. Then challenge yourself to look for that unpredictable bridge to jump from to sprout your wings or that limb to reach the fruit of the tree, and you don’t have to fear being consumed by the crocodile anymore.
Follow me on Twitter. Check out my website or some of my other work here.This article was adapted from Forbe.